Well, he likes raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens.
But those aren’t his favorites.
His favorites are just a little bit weirder than that.
(Although, those things are pretty weird in my opinion.)
So what I’m saying is — my child is a freak.
1. The stuffed elephant. I’ve blogged about this before. He’s got serious love for this elephant. He only took his first steps when I spoke on behalf of the elephant and asked him to walk to “me.” Kid wouldn’t walk for the person who gave him life…no, no. He walked for the elephant. And here’s a tip to any of you first-time or thinking-about-becoming parents: Maybe you should try to make your child’s favorite toy be just a little smaller than a giant stuffed elephant. We look ridiculous with him holding onto this thing in the grocery store. No one can see Tom. I look like I’m pushing an elephant around while I do my shopping. Now who’s the freak?
2. When Kipper drops sticks on Tiger’s head. Does that make even any sense to you? At all? No? You’re probably not a parent of a toddler, or you don’t let your child watch a British cartoon about a dog named Kipper. Tom doesn’t watch a lot of television, but when he does watch it — it’s Kipper. And there is a particular episode where Kipper is building a nest in a tree (confusing?) and while he’s hauling up sticks, they fall and land on his friend, Tiger’s, head. Tom laughs out loud at this. LAUGHS OUT LOUD. Every time. Tom loves seeing dogs get hit with sticks. I laugh when people trip, though, so he maybe gets his happy meanness from me.
3. Huck’s paws. Tom is not allowed to touch Huck’s paws, therefore he LOVES Huck’s paws. That is all. (See also: Huck’s tail, Huck’s nose, Huck’s water dish.)
4. Pizza. He eats as much as me. He really does. And he’ll eat any kind of pizza. Except that really gross pizza Kev ordered a couple weeks ago when we were in NC. Even my pizza-loving child knew that was sick.
5. Planes, trains and automobiles. And TRUCKS! I’m not sure this fascination will ever end. He sees or hears an airplane? He sticks his arms out like he is one. He sees a truck, car, SUV, weiner-mobile? He shouts, “Truck!” He hears or sees a train? “Train!” Although, his “train” sounds more like, “Ain.” He loves all modes of transportation. Currently he’s interested in pointing out bicycles and wheelchairs. But right now he makes his “doggie” sound when he sees those, so we’ve got some work to do there.
6. Massages. Giving a baby a massage is weirdly amusing to me. I’ll rub his little shoulders and he smiles, laughs, stretches and usually falls over. What’s not to love about your mom
pushing you down massaging your shoulders?
7. Balls. Tom’s rules for loving balls include: Anything that is a circle is a ball. Anything that is ball-shaped is a ball. Anything that is sort of ball shaped is a ball. Apples are balls. Lemons are balls. Brussel sprouts are balls. Sometimes I am a ball. But I don’t know why.
8. Running. Now, he still won’t walk very far on his own, although he will walk anywhere if he’s holding a hand. But running? Well, he loves it. In order for Tom to run, you must let him stand in front of you and hold both his hands. Then you must say “Ready, Set, Go!” and start running with him. He will laugh hysterically, stop and then say “Wa-wa, ma-ma, beeeee!” and that means you do it again.
9. Buddy. Our next door neighbor’s name is Buddy. He has great-grandchildren of his own, but none of them live next door. Tom does. Buddy put up a swing he made himself in his backyard for Tom. Buddy comes over every day to walk with Tom and push Tom in the swing. Buddy hugs Tom and they hold hands a lot. They are best friends. Seriously, watching them will turn you to mush. I promise.
10. Eee-eye-eee-eye-oh! He doesn’t like the whole “Old MacDonald Had A Farm” part. He only likes the “Eee-eye-eee-eye-oh” part. If he starts crying or pitching a fit in public, just loudly sing that part and he will stop and smile. You will look like an idiot. But he will look adorable.