7 Months Going On 2 Years.

See this guy?  He’s supposed to be 7-months-old.  I could’ve sworn he was born in February of this year. But he’s morphed into a 2-year-old.

Clearly I had him in 2008 and just don’t remember it that way.  I thought I was busy going on cruises and buying a house and drinking martinis on Saturday nights with friends in 2008.

But no.  I had Tom.  Because this child — this grown up looking child — cannot possibly be only 7-months-old.  Right?!

He’s a total giant.

I’m blaming the outfit.  It was cute in the store when I bought it, but it should’ve been marked “Will make your child look 18 months older!” on it.  If it had said that, I wouldn’t have gotten it.

I don’t buy any clothes that are marked that way.

Especially for me.

You know those matching capri pant, cardigan sets are marked that way, right?

That’s why I don’t own any of those.

Now Tom:  Stop growing.  I mean it.  Don’t make me call Cher to turn back time.  She’s been plastic surgi-fied and you wouldn’t like her face.  I try to protect you from scary things, but you need to meet me halfway on this.  Be littler.  Just a little littler.  But keep up the good sleep work.  Mmmmmkay?  Thanks!  xoxo

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