Tom can now pull himself up to standing position pretty quickly.
I feel like he went from crawling to this new phase in the blink of an eye.
This newfound standing means that I have entered phase 2 of baby proofing my house.
Did you know it came in phases?
I totally didn’t.
I thought I had baby proofed my home — but I had only done it for a crawler, not a stander.
Now that he can stand, I’ve had to move everything off our coffee table for instance. All the cute items I lovingly chose to display on our coffee table are now haphazardly up on shelves.
Where they totally don’t belong.
In addition to standing, Tom is now really into opening and closing drawers and cabinets.
Again with the coffee table.
He opens all the drawers and takes all the stuff out.
Stuff that was not lovingly chosen to live in the drawers. It’s a mess in there. A mish-mash of candles, pens, my old driver’s license, a metal spinning top, fan pulls and matches.
Stuff that is awesome for a baby to play with.
So Tom has started going through the drawers every day.
Generally, he goes for the same things — a couple of DVDs, a bag of incense, and an alumni newsletter from our university.
Because of that, I had kind of put off emptying out all the other things from the drawers. I thought that since he didn’t really go for anything else, and I was always watching him when he was going through them, that I had time to empty the drawers and find new homes for all that crap.
He always just pulls out the regular things, tastes them, leaves them on the floor.
Except for the other day when I turned my back for a second.
You hear parents say that. And it’s true. It was one second.
Okay, maybe five.
I had just finished lathering Tom up with lotion and I went to wipe my hand on a bathroom towel.
Our bathroom is right next to the living room.
When I turned back, I saw Tom still playing with the stuff from the drawers.
And then I realized he looked weird.
You remember in The Goonies when Mouth put all those pearls in his mouth?
Tom looked like that.
I sat down and looked at Tom.
“Tom, is there something in your mouth?”
He purposefully kept his mouth shut.
So I kind of opened his lip.
And I saw it. Some big, yellow thing.
So I quickly opened his mouth and got it out.
I have no idea what it was. Like a 1-inch long plastic bead with a metal spring on it. What?
All it was to me was a choke hazard.
Or it could’ve been stamped with “Mom, why weren’t you watching your baby?!”
I threw it away.
And then I got out a box and I completely emptied every single drawer.
And then I filled the drawers with things that weren’t choke hazards.
Like toys. And a piece of tupperware. And some DVD cases.
And I maybe left that alumni newsletter from our university.
And now, I’m going to go ahead and get a head start on phase 3 of baby proofing.
You know, before my child almost chokes.